Posts tagged ‘butterfly’

Your Muse

This is written in honour of women who suffer from domestic abuse and violence and in particular for my friend Zoe. She is emerging from the shell of the person she had become, to blossom and shine through and to once again embrace the glorious woman she has always been and will continue to be.

 

What happened? What is love?

Is it the tingle, the rush to see each other,

The bliss of togetherness and the desire for more

Or is it the steady pace of eroding my confidenceWhite-Ribbon-Day-November-25

In a light-hearted yet relenting onslaught of your

Perceived kindness and outward caring

That all can see and wonder about

In admiration and perhaps envy?

I, who love you am left in confusion and more

And my self-image torn asunder under your

Tutelage and careful grooming to morph

Myself through your sculpting hands into

Your idea or the model of your notion

The constant sound of your voice

Instructing me in how I should present

Myself to compliment the image of

How I appear in your imagination

Your perfect muse to my pathetic

Attempt to mound myself and be your

Everlasting ideal of perfection

Even my culinary creations no

Longer please you, nor the

Outfit that earned the compliments

Of others. The invitations no longer

Arrive and my friends avoid us or shun

The call for a social gathering. PerhapsDomesticviolence

You’re right as my carefree laughter

And sense of the ridiculous are at odds

 

With all and anyway, I no longer find

Life amusing or entertaining

How is it your kind instructions only

Make me more useless and in following

Them, more clumsy and inept?

I creep down the stairs in strained silence

To ward off your irritation at the sight of me

Does this outfit become me? Is my hair in place?

I did not wear my mother’s necklace nor the

Lipstick that matches so well. I seem to have

Lost my way and no longer want to shop

My voice seems to irritate you as does the

Once lilting laugh that you treasured

How can I please you, I ask myself in vain.

Why am I a constant source of bother

A rash that itches to cause you undue pain

I feel so unworthy of your time and effort

And your patience is beginning to wear thin

I’m trying to please you but I no longer

Have it within me to conquer the fear

That is my constant companion

How did I get to where I am

Why am I so pathetic. I don’t deserve

Your kindness nor your attention

To detail. You surprise me at your attentivenessWhite-Ribbon-Day-Time-to-stan-860x450_c

It bewilders the pathetic person that I am

Why are you still with me?

More importantly, why am I still here?

 

(C) Wendy Robinson September 2015

Just when the caterpillar thought its life was over, it became a butterfly. ~ Proverb

 

White Ribbon Day began on November 25th and this Australian and international, male-led campaign will incorporate 16 days of Activism in promoting protection of and preventing domestic violence against women.

Domestic violence is often mistakenly viewed as a physical assault when it can also comprise of mental, emotional and psychological abuse. Mental abuse often erodes the confidence of the abused and robs them of their dignity and independence and they can end up questioning their self-worth as did my friend Zoe.

I would recommend reading Susan Chenery’s essay in Fury: Women Write about Sex, Power and Violence. “Still wrapped up in the glow of the ‘great love,’ you don’t know you’re in danger,” she states. A smart and educated woman, the author candidly relates about the mental and physical abuse she suffered at the hands of the handsome and charming Marco and her essay piece gives a clear account of ‘mental and emotional’ abuse.

Disclaimer: The images are from the White Ribbon Day photo gallery and my thanks go to the various photographers for their work.

Please leave and share your comment on the subject.

Baby Brains

FatherwithyellowstrollerI love babies and I have to confess, my heart gets touched big time when I see fathers walking their babies or toddlers in their prams or strollers. I regularly see a grandfather strolling at a snail’s pace, pushing a mysterious grandchild in a large pram. He nods politely but I’ve often wondered if he felt that if he rushed, he might jar the baby awake as he keeps the pace even when rain threatens and it is sprinkling. And for all I know, he could be pushing a large watermelon in that pram as I’ve never seen the bub to date. He always has a muslin cover over the pram, but what a lovely grandfather he is to do this regularly and with such patience!

FatherwithmobilephoneWhat is astounding at times however, is the opportunities that the fathers and at times, mothers, are ‘wasting’ in not interacting or conversing with the child! You have a captive audience parents, why not make the most of it! I have to admit, I feel crestfallen when I see a parent reading or talking on their mobile or cell phone while automatically pushing the pram and not taking that opportunity to engage with their child.

We have heard often enough that a baby’s brain is like a sponge that is ready to soak up information as fast as it can, so, when scientists point out that 90 percent of the brain develops within the first five years of a child’s life and triples in weight by three years of age, we as parents, need to take note!  Would you also believe, billions, that is, not hundreds or thousands, or even millions, but billions of nerve connections or synapses are established in that time frame and these nerve connections are twice that of any adult? It is therefore imperative to stimulate and engage your child within those first three years of their life.

Remember folks, we are always being advised that ‘communication’ is the key! So go ahead and talk to your child! Babies love being engaged in conversation and happily interact with any adult who will smile and spend the time talking to them. They will giggle, laugh and coo whenever someone plays ‘peek-a-boo’ or recites a nursery rhyme with actions with them.

ButterflyonflowerI would often sing nursery rhymes while pushing the stroller or comment about the butterfly on the flower; the bird singing somewhere in the bush; the fluffy clouds overhead; the train travelling past in the distance or even the sound of a truck braking. My face would be animated as I would enthuse, ‘wasn’t that a noisy truck or listen to the call of that whipbird.’ My baby would listen intently absorbing the words, the enunciation, the expression and my enthusiasm.

And in the words of neurobiologist Martha Pierson, of the Baylor College of Medicine, ‘Children need a flood of information, a banquet, a feast!’ What exactly is she implying? She is encouraging adults to bombard and engage the mind of a baby with sounds, facts, figures, fiction and definitely, fantasy.

Sing to them, tease their minds with nursery rhymes, drive their imagination with tales of fantasy, and tickle their sense of humour with nonsensical poems and comedy. And all that can be done on the daily or weekly walk in their pram!

© Wendy Robinson September 2015

When you hold your baby in your arms for the first time, and you think of all the things you can say and do to influence him, it’s a tremendous responsibility. What you do with him can influence not only him, but everyone he meets and not for a day or a month or a year but for time and eternity. ~ Rose Kennedy

Disclaimer: The photos are not my own but are courtesy of the internet photo images.

Your comments stimulate more comments, so please let me know your thoughts.

 

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